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Marriages become distressed for a variety of reasons. In our turnaround weekend for crisis marriages, we see them all; infidelity, addiction, poor communication, lack of love, anger, and more. Vashikaran Mantra To Control Husband Wife One of the most common difficulties leading couples to us is one spouse controlling or dominating the other Some controlled or dominated spouses finally had enough and decided not to take it any longer. They took a stand and made it clear that if things do not change the marriage will soon be over. Others fell into an emotional relationship with someone who treated them with dignity and respect. All have one thing in common: they demand a different life than the one they have been subjected to in their marriages.
Though in actuality the marriage has been in trouble for some time, the other spouse did not recognize the severity of the problem. From our workshops, we know that most controlling or dominating spouses have little comprehension of how their actions affect their spouses. As they become aware of their husband or wife’s negative reactions to them, they typically justify their behaviors by explaining their intentions. We often hear them say things such as:
I admit that I can be a little harsh in the way I say things, but that’s just the way I am. He knew that when he married me. I never meant to make him feel bad about himself.
Because this problem prevails in so many marriages, I placed a survey online for people who feel that their spouses control or dominate them. Though not exhaustive, the survey indicated at least nine areas in which people feel controlled or dominated by their spouses. Unfortunately, only females responded to the survey. Therefore, all quotes in the next section are from women. However, we know from our work with marriages that situations exist where the wife dominates or Vashikaran Mantra To Control Husband Wife.
Because so many controlling or dominating people tend to dismiss complaints from their spouses, I supply the quotes below with two goals. First, I wish to demonstrate to those who feel controlled that they are not alone and that they should not dismiss their frustrations as selfishness or misunderstanding. Second, I give examples of how several different people feel controlled in hopes of creating awareness of the dominating spouse of how his/her actions are perceived. Let's look at nine specific signs and unhealthy ways that a spouse controls.
Writing about her current husband, one respondent stated, “He makes choices for me including the food I eat.” Referring to a former spouse, another respondent wrote, “I wasn't allowed to wear makeup or ‘revealing’ clothes. However, he required me to wear sexy lingerie weekly.” She went on to state, “He installed spyware on my personal laptop and tracked every website I visited for the entire eight years of our marriage without my knowledge and used that information to verbally attack and criticize me.” Another person said of her former spouse, “He used religion to try to control me.” In a similar vein, another wrote about her former spouse, “His control began primarily through religion and gradually grew to a complete totalitarian system including dress code, language, schedule, even private prayers.”
One spouse said of her current husband, “He gets angry if I make a mistake.” Another said her spouse controls her through yelling at her. Writing about her former husband, one person stated, “He would give me the silent treatment for days at a time when he got mad at me. He was verbally abusive and lectured me like a little child.” A young wife said of her current spouse, “He had (and is still working on) anger issues and I quickly became afraid of his outbursts, though he never hit or hurt me physically.”
A respondent wrote of her current husband, “He is constantly sarcastic towards me.” A woman said of her former Vashikaran Mantra To Control Husband Wife, “He was very verbally critical and found a way to twist anything I valued into a weapon to control me. He tried to make me feel that I was bad or wrong or undeserving.”
Vashikaran Mantra To Control Husband Wife, a respondent stated, “He controlled all money including my paycheck. He gave me an allowance of $100 per week for anything I or my daughter needed.” About her former spouse, one woman wrote, “He spent money with no regard to our ability to earn money, including running up a home equity loan.” Another said of her former husband, “He made it clear that HE made all the money and was angry if I spent any (he made more than $700,000 per year). To stop his accusations about my spending, Vashikaran Mantra To Control Husband Wife I would cut coupons, shop sales, etc., and then write the check for the full amount. I kept the savings as 'cookie jar' money so I could buy him a Christmas or birthday present without him seeing the credit card bill. When he discovered what I did, he blew up and said I was stealing from him.”
Most people who control or dominate their spouses do not believe that they do so. They offer reasons for their behaviors and see them as justified. If as you read the above quotes from the survey respondents, you recognized emotions or comments that you spouse has made, consider carefully whether you are controlling or dominating, no matter your intentions. If you think you may be, give this article to your spouse and ask if he or she feels any of the things identified in the quotes above. (NOTE: do not expect a controlled or dominated spouse to answer honestly unless you give total immunity for his or her response.) If you control your spouse, you very likely control and dominate your children as well,
even if you do not intend to do so. As one woman wrote, “I was willing to live with it because of the kids, but when he started talking to my 10-year-old like he did to me (she looks just like me) I snapped. I called an attorney, got a backbone, and kicked him out.” We realize that a person demonstrating one or more of the above actions occasionally does not mean that he or she is controlling or dominating. None of us is perfect and each of us can display less than ideal behavior at times.
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